Before we get started, I would just like to direct your attention HERE.
Because Fightball: Dying of Suck … obviously.
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Mark is frustrated. “Putting recessed lighting in the front hallway is turning out to be a huge pain in the ass.”
“I can’t see what I’m doing. I thought the joists ran one way, but I keep running into beams where they shouldn’t be. They’re spaced oddly. It’s making it almost impossible to run the wires. I might have to rip down part of the ceiling.”
“Don’t do that.”
He sighs, settles himself into a chair and starts flipping through television-viewing options. “In other news, according to my doctor, I have reached the age at which I am supposed to get a colonoscopy, and I made an appointment, but then I got the estimate of cost, and it was insane.”
“Like how insane?”
He provides a figure, and I stare at him. “Seriously?”
“I know, right?”
I reach for my phone. “That doesn’t sound right.” I do a few searches on my phone and hold the screen up for him to see. “Look. This place does the procedure for a fraction of the cost you were quoted.”
He leans to look at the screen. “Are alleys involved? I don’t want a back-alley colonoscopy.”
“Do you even hear the words that come out of your mouth?”
He thinks for a second and laughs. “You know what I mean.”
I click a few more links. “Cancel the appointment you made. We’ll figure something else out.”
“I already did. Oh, and I ordered an endoscope.” He looks at me, senses my confusion. “Through Amazon.”
“You ordered an endoscope?”
“Yeah, it’s got a little light and a camera at the end of a long flexible tube …”
“I KNOW WHAT AN ENDOSCOPE IS.”
He is puzzled by my tone. “Anyway, it should get the job done. Save us some money.”
I stare at him.
He stares at me. “To see into the space beyond the ceiling so I can run the wires properly, you fool.”
“Oh … thank … god.”